It is a distinguisher in high-performers — and people I admire
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“What makes you think he’d be suitable for the role”, she asked me. I thought for a minute and responded, “he is one of those people that is more interested in getting it right — than being right. Because of that, he continually gets good outcomes”, and deep down, I knew I meant it, even more, I admired it.
This fundamental characteristic is one of the key things that distinguish the people I want to surround myself with. The people I identify as high-performers. But what does it mean? Let’s explore the concept a little.
Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right. — Ezra Taft Benson
There is a tendency for leaders to want to be ‘knowers’. They feel respected for the knowledge they have and feel valued when they can answer the questions of their team. Answering questions creates a dependency that feels good.
But what happens when the leader doesn’t know the answer. They know a little but can’t say with certainty that it is the correct answer.
In this case, they have a decision to make. Do they want to be right or get it right? A prideful and perhaps insecure leader will choose to try and be right. A humble and secure leader might instead decide to try and get it right.
When you try to be right, you focus on securing your title as the ‘knower’ and the person ‘in charge’. When you focus on getting it right, you focus on the outcome. You focus on gathering all the information and options and helping to make the excellent decision — not trying to make it.
This delineation separates the type of people I prefer to interact with and the people I admire.
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Getting it right means inviting not knowing
It isn’t that people don’t like to be right. On the contrary, everyone wants to know that their perspective and experience are valuable and that they can use their organisational leverage to affect outcomes. This feels good.
However, the person who is willing to acknowledge that they don’t know, that they do not have all the answers, admitting that they are not the repository of all good ideas. These people are more interested in getting it right, knowing that their value comes in getting the right decision, rather than having all the answers.
To be ready to engage in this model as a leader, they will need to be prepared to invite conversations that make them uncomfortable. These conversations pick away at their knowledge gaps, and that is uncomfortable.
Nobody likes the feeling of insecurity or inadequacy, but the humble leader realises that their value comes from getting the right answer — not knowing the right answer.
The simple way to invite this from those around you is to learn three compelling words and three uncomfortable words for leaders who can change a team dynamic.
I don’t know
These three words enable you to start a conversation that focuses on getting it right rather than trying to be right. If leaders want to create energy around this, they can append a few more words to those three.
I don’t know, but wouldn’t it be great to find out
If a leader can be secure enough in their identity and the value they can bring to the team, they can step into the space required to focus on getting it right.
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Is there a balance?
The thing with becoming more comfortable with saying I don’t know is working out when the leader has to decide. There comes the point when a leader, whose role is to move the team towards the ultimate objectives, needs to become comfortable ‘enough’ with knowing they don’t know. Comfortable enough to make a decision.
In any moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing — Theodore Roosevelt
This is a tension that leaders need to strive to find. Admitting you don’t know and are interested in getting it right and not being right infers that you have the optimal amount of time to make all decisions. Unfortunately, this is not true, and it is in this space, that leaders show their value.
Dan Rockwell, the Leadership Freak, asks us to consider that all decisions are wrong and that we make imperfect decisions at best. He encourages us to use these five principles when making imperfect decisions:
- First, don’t pretend you made the perfect decision. Stay curious.
- Make room for improvement after making tough decisions. Stay flexible.
- Don’t project or protect the illusion that you have all the answers. Stay humble.
- Admit when you screw up. Stay vulnerable.
- Always seek the best interest of those you serve. Stay service-minded.
These resonate with the idea that imperfect decisions can lead to optimal outcomes if there is a focus on getting it right and not being right.
So, as a leader, there are three essential things to remember for working on getting it right — more.
Try and get it right more, and be right less.
This takes bravery as a leader — not bravery as in boldness or recklessness, but the bravery it takes to expose a weakness, to be vulnerable. Of course, being right does not help your team; it does not help you. However, getting it right takes the ego away from the outcome, and it becomes a team success, not an individual success, which is incredibly powerful.
Saying “I don’t know” is powerful, but…
“I don’t know” is a powerful way to invite conversation with others. To allow space for alternate opinions and open a dialogue that focuses on getting it right. However, a leader needs to find the tension point required to continue to progress. Opening the dialogue creates space for information gathering and finding details that a ‘knower-leader’ might have shut down and missed. However, the decision space is temporal, and a leader will need to progress from information gathering to deciding on time. As such, a leader will need to embrace the discomfort of the imperfect decision.
Invite the tension of the imperfect decision
As Teddy Roosevelt said, the worst decision is often none at all. A leader should invite the conversation to get it right but be cognisant that analysis paralysis can afflict us all. The ‘what if I had better information’ cycle plagues all humble leaders, but someone needs to take responsibility. And that is the role of the leader.
I admire people who prefer to get it right, those willing to enter the dialogue required to get the best available information and perspectives, and then work towards the best decision.
These are the people I like to surround myself with, learn from, and get better together.
And more — I strive to be.
Right now, the world could benefit from driving this expectation from all leaders.
Leon writes about leadership and personal development. He is inspired to create high-performing teams and grow leaders; he blogs, mentors and coaches leaders and future leaders from across industries. Editor of Sparks Publication, a publication aimed at transferring a spark from the writer’s mind to the soul of the readers.
Leadership; the art of balance and the three most powerful words
A Leadership Sparkmedium.com
By Leon Purton on April 15, 2022.
Exported from Medium on December 22, 2023.
